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Post by Planetbox on Jan 14, 2017 15:02:02 GMT -5
Helena IMMEDIATELY uses the Holy Grail to launch Jane Jetson's robot into another dimension. (OshaliteX2) In doing so, she also pulls all of Jane Jetson's spares and the kitchen sink into the portal as well. Jane Jetson's is declared out of the duel. George Jetson looks mildly annoyed. Helena then tells Nozomi to use her invention, the Smolitzer, a big robot thing. George Jetson, fueled by his mild annoyance, shoots a laser that bounces off fifteen surfaces and hits the Smolitzer's self-destruct button. The explosion knocks out Nozomi and does a lot of damage to El Kabong. He plays some beautiful music that restores his help though. Meanwhile, two of the Technicolor Agent Squad are in critical condition. Agent Yellow goes to check on them. (Agent Yellow) He finds that they are indeed in critical condition, since they both have 0.0000001 HP left. Agent Yellow looks majorly annoyed. What will you do now?
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King Arthur shouts back, "Your mother 'twas a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!" (Sable-Xeno) The French guard guy says, "Oh, man, that's a good one! HAHAHA! I remember using that a lot in the Wars of the Hundred Years... or whatever." His movements seemed fairly slow and clumsy as he turned around and, placing a hand at his mouth, shouted, "Hey, Jean Pizza Clause, come look at this!" Another man soon appears at the balcony, shouting, "It's Jean Pierreclaude, you half-wit! What are you doing up here, away from your station?! And why do you have all those empty wine glasses?" The first man continues, "Hey, Johnny, those guys used that joke we used to use! You know the one, 'Your father was an elderberry and your mother smelt of hamsters!' It was hilarious!" He then started hiccuping loudly. Pierreclaude shouted, "How many of those blasted bottle of wine have you had!" The drunk Frenchman replied, "Uh... Maybe about eight and a half?" He suddenly began hiccuping so fast and loud that he fell over the balcony and fell on the ground and was unconscious. Jean Pierreclaude looked over the balcony and made a face of mad at your group. You decided that this was your chance. In French, you attempted to say, "You're fat!" (OshaliteX2) Jean replied, "Did you just compare my mother to a taco?! How dare you! I'll get you for that, you worthless street urchins. Pierreclaude picks up several large objects, and begin throwing them over the parapet at your group. What will you do now?
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Post by OshaliteX2 on Jan 14, 2017 17:21:11 GMT -5
Helena: Look at George disapprovingly.
Batterstump: Make like Kiragi and use teamwork! Get all your allies to catch the stuff and throw it back. Ha!
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Post by Sable-Xeno on Jan 15, 2017 20:43:21 GMT -5
Helena: Attempt to capture Agent Red
Agent Yellow: Don't let that happen.
El Kabong: Don't let Agent Yellow not let happen what Helena wants to let happen
"...Should we intercept now?
"No...give it some more time..."
Alex: Suplex the large objects thrown at you, just because you can.
Horace: Send out Lord Dome. Have Lord Dome slice up any large objects Alex can't suplex.
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Post by Planetbox on Feb 18, 2017 17:12:13 GMT -5
In case you didn't see already, this will be the last segment of Planetbox's Neverending CYOA of Mass Confusion. There are two main reasons:
1. I'm losing motivation. Since this CYOA doesn't have a story and has a rather small number of posts, I'm losing motivation to actually write it. Especially because a low post count basically removes the main point of the CYOA itself.
2. I'm losing time. As Vesti's CYOA gets more ambitious (with longer, better planned cases and original music) I find myself losing time for other stuff. I'm also noticing that updates for Just a Generic CYOA tend to take a while to put together as well. And, of course, I'm gonna be in junior year soon, so it's probably a good idea to not have too much on my plate.
Anyway, without further ado, let's begin the update. And trust me, I won't rush this segment just because it's the last one. In fact, I'll try to make it even better than the norm, to give this CYOA as good a send-off as possible.
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Helena Dimentio gives George a dissaproving look. He is stunned for one turn. (OshaliteX2) Then, Helena pulls out some special rope she invented and uses it to lasso up Agent Red. Agent Red is quickly tied up, and I mean literally, so Helena puts one foot on him successfully like they do in those old movies that everybody hates. He is declared out of the Future Duel. (Sable-Xeno) Agent Yellow tries to stop her, due to not liking the way things are going, but El Kabong puts a stop to that by wrapping his guitar strap around Yellow's neck and pulling him back, almost strangling him. George Jetson decides to stop being stunned. Taking his laser pistol, he shoots Agent Yellow five times in the face, greatly injuring him. El Kabong puts him down on the ground, and then starts an epic guitar solo, which is so powerful that it throws five of George Jetson's laser guns off the side of the arena. He pulls out another one. El Kabong concludes the solo with a knee slide straight into Agent Silver, who is knocked unconscious. Agent Yellow is now the only member of his group left in the Future Duel, but he's in quite a bad way. However, George Jetson isn't doing well either. What will Helena do now?
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Alex Batterstump is rather surprised to see the objects hurtling towards him from the top of the castle, but he quickly springs into action. He first grabs a barrel, and suplexes it right into the castle wall. (Sable-Xeno) The force of the blow appears to damage the castle wall somewhat. Seeing him do this, King Arthur turns to his men and shouts, "Alright everyone! Follow the example of the wimpy janitor and destroy that wall!" All the men cheer, and begin grabbing large objects in mid-air and throwing them at the wall with considerable force. (OshaliteX2) Meanwhile, Horace pulls out a Pokeball and throws it, releasing Lord Dome. The beast slices apart especially large objects, allowing the group to throw their divided parts at the wall as well. (Sable-Xeno) It isn't long before an opening appears in the wall. King Arthur raises his sword into the air and leads the charge. Unfortunately, his entry is met by a large number of French soldiers, armed with swords, lances, and French flags on very sharp flagpoles. He turns around, directing the group to retreat, but soon he hears the pained cry of one of Robin's minstrels. Alex chances a look behind him, and sees the minstrel's corpse on the ground, with Jean Pierreclaude standing above him holding a red-stained axe. Jean raises the axe, and shouts, "It's hopeless, English scum! You are all a bunch of headless chickens, charging ahead without thinking. Now look at your current situation! Will you surrender, or will you continue to fight? Choose carefully!" King Arthur appears to be carefully considering both options. What will Alex do now?
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Post by OshaliteX2 on Feb 18, 2017 19:00:05 GMT -5
Helena: Shoot a big robotic boot out of the cup gun and kick both Yellow and George out of the duel.
... actually, grab yellow and transfigure him into a copy of Pokémon Yellow. Make your own DoomBOTy. ???. Profit.
Yes, actually. Profit! Mass-produce those robotic pets of considerable doom and make hordes of money off of it! Become more profitable than even Notsha-Corp®!!
Impossible. Besides, that joke died a long time ago and was barely even funny. Profitable beyond comprehension, but not funny.
And punch the Notshalite in the face to say NO! You will be the very richest! Like nobody ever was!
If anyone tries to rise up against you once you have the market in the palm of your hand and are the richest person across multiple galaxies and dimensions, flip a switch that you had ALL ALONG and turn all of the robo doom pets to your side and become RULER OF THE FUTURE!!!!
That should do.
Batterstump: Shout "LOOK, A DISTRACTION!!". Beat up everyone who opposes you as they search for the distraction.
On second thought, maybe just beat up Jean then surrender to the rest and see what happens.
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Post by Sable-Xeno on Feb 18, 2017 22:14:49 GMT -5
Alex: Praise Dome. This should give Lord Dome enough power to level the French Army! Maybe. "...Looks like they're about to get slaughtered by those Frenchmen...should we just call it and go back? I'm a little worried about the others. We haven't gotten word back from them-""Look. Even if THEY fail to use the Time Machine, we still have to worry about the French. You know our mission..." "...Fine. But if Murray is put into any exceptional danger...it's your head, Iri.""Geez, Umile. Calm down. It might be his first day on the job, but he's not going down THAT easily..." (>'-')> <('-'<) ^(' - ')^ <('-'<) (>'-')> <('-'<) ^(' - ')^ <('-'<) ^(' - ')^ <('-'<) <('-'<) ^(' - ')^ (>'-')> "So much...for my first day on the job..."Agent Yellow is...near the end of his rope. He has...but one option left to him. He presses an emergency switch on his collar, sending a signal to Agent Blue... He hasn't a moment to spare. Blue begins typing up at his station's keyboard, sirens blaring in the backround. A lever is pulled, and... Back at the sight of the future duel, a mysterious vortex opens up above the arena. Out from the vortex drops a gigantic, pig-shaped robot. Yellow: Reveal YOUR invention in the future duel: :origin()/pre09/1674/th/pre/f/2016/208/7/d/natural_killer_cyborg_by_angrymenish-dablh35.png) Codename: Big Pink. Helen: ...Ignore the giant robot and capture Agent Yellow for your own amusement. You don't know why, but you get the idea you'll be able to make big bucks off the guy. Agent Red: Lament the fact that you didn't get to use YOUR invention. Big Pink: Use an electric shock attack, blasting Helen with a blasting blast of electrical blast![/font] |
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Post by Planetbox on Feb 26, 2017 11:56:27 GMT -5
Helena immediately shoots a robotic boot out of the cup that hits George Jetson right in the face. (OshaliteX2) George is sent flying off the side of the floating island, but a guy with a jetpack catches him before he is injured. Still, he is disqualified, and the Jetson team is out of the Future Deal. The crowd gets into a frenzy, as the competition drops to just two teams. However, it doesn’t look like Agent Yellow has much of a chance. Not being what to care what human’s think is impossible, Agent Yellow calls in Big Pink, a totally original, not-stolen robot. (Agent Yellow) Helena doesn’t care about his stupid robutt. She walks up, grabs him, and stuffs him in a suitcase. (Sable-Xeno) Agent Yellow is considered unable to battle, but the goofy pig guy is still here. Helena considers using Agent Yellow to make a bunch of DoomBOTy’s, but she doesn’t have enough robotics kits. Also, I’d prefer to keep Just a Generic CYOA self-contained, THANKS. (OshaliteX2) Big Pink tried to decimate Helena with a cool defibrillator style shock attack, but then good ol’ El Kabong flies in from the side and whacks Big Pink with his guitar. Big Pink flies backwards and explodes. All of El Kabong’s insane fans go wild, and throw money at him. He thanks the crowd, and then flies off stage left. Suddenly, Johnathan McChambers returns, just in time for Helena and him to win the Future Duel. The Jetsons leave in shame. What will Helena do now?
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Arthur’s face is scrunched up as he thinks carefully about the decision. Alex knows he needs to act fast, so he points at the far wall and shouts, “OH NO! A DISTRACTION!” (OshaliteX2) Only about half the Frenchmen look, but most of your group looks too, so it’s kinda useless. Jean Pierreclaude, who also didn’t look, shouts, “HA! Stupid Englishmen! The French are too brilliantly perceptive to fall for your stupid trickery! Prepare to die!” He raises his axe, but is interrupted by a loud whistling sound. Jean lowers his axe and looks down, noticing the arrow now sticking out of his chest. He looks back up and shouts, “Well, sacré my bleu and call me a baguette!” Then, he collapses forward, the crack of the arrow signaling his impact with the ground. This reveals Will standing outside the opening, with another arrow already loaded into his quiver. Apparently the ranger hadn’t actually entered the castle! Alex also notices two strange creatures lurking outside the castle, but then forgets he saw them. Instead he shouts several compliments to Lord Dome, giving him the strength to immediately wreck five enemy French guys. (Sable-Xeno) King Arthur jovially shouts, “English scum NEVER surrender!” and then stabs a guys with his sword. The other knights enter one-on-one combat with the French, while Horace and Lord Dome successfully defeat several at once. Meanwhile, Will uses his cloak to sneak around the base, stabbing people with his saxe knife like some kind of super spy. Just when it looks like the battle is turning in your favor, more French scrubs charge in from a door leading into the fort with a sign next to it reading, “Dungeon and Time Machine Storage Place.” The English continue to fight off the French, but they seem evenly matched. You’ll need something new to turn the tide again. What will Alex do now?
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Post by OshaliteX2 on Feb 26, 2017 14:59:10 GMT -5
Helena: Shoot a time portal to Alex for the sake of a Deus Ex Machina and give the latter a laser-sword upgrade to his bat-broom.
Batterstump: Turn your talking bat-broom into a talking laser-sword-bat-broom and go nuts. Completely forget that the upgrade came from the exact place where you should be going.
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Post by Sable-Xeno on Feb 27, 2017 0:58:30 GMT -5
"...Agent Red has been tied up. Agent Silver has been knocked unconscious. And Agent Yellow has been kidnapped. Agents green and black are still out on the field, but...not in that time, or place. I don't often come to you for this kind of thing, but...you're an experienced warrior. Not just with what we do as part of our jobs, but even as much as the world this is all taking place in. I'm begging of you, please...we need your help!""...You already know what I think about time travel, 'Blue'. Besides, I've saved Vytoetra enough times in my life. Last thing I need's to be involved with yet another setting that makes no sense whatsoever.""Edgy much? You're sounding more like me by the second...what's gotten into you lately? Problem with the misses? Feeling left out of the spotlight?""No. I just know when not to get involved now. I won't stop you from what you're doing, because it will have adverse effects on the past, present, and future...but I'm no enforcer of time. You're talking to the wrong man for that. Besides...I'm sure they'll pull through.""I'm only asking because I can't be there, myself. If something happened to Yellow, I...I don't know if I could forgive myself for letting that happen.""Fine. But only if I get a cool code-name, too. You know...something like..."
"Agent Purple."*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+ "...They know it's a Time Machine? We may very well be too late." "Well, if they know...and these guys know...you know what, $@&* it. Wanna Leeroy Jenkins this?""...Sure, why not. You distract the guards. I'll come in from above." "Got it. It's time for MY ULTIMATE TECHNIQUE! GIL TOSS!" Agent Green: Slither into the fray, flinging dozens of golden coins from a satchel. If any get close to you, wrap around them tightly enough to knock them unconscious.  Agent Black: Quicker than the eye can trace, fly straight into the 'Time Machine and Supplies' storage area. If someone decides to shoot at you with arrows, slash them apart with a vacuum wave. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+ Agent Red: Attempt to cut out of your bindings using your invention: a pointed staff you carry around everywhere with you. That is, until Helena ᔕᑌᑕᑕ's you into her Pocket Dimension Suitcase along with Agent Silver. Helena: Take a good, long look at the Holy Grail...then back to McChambers. You tell him that it's time to head back to home, like an Owl retreating into the nook of his tree! Said home being the Velvet Mansion/Nightcapped Casino, re-built after the Ultimate Noodle War of XX3X, and inherited by you from another branch of your family...
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Post by Planetbox on Feb 27, 2017 21:03:34 GMT -5
Some more ridiculousness happens offscreen to make my job as complicated as possible. What will actually come out of this remains to be seen.
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Helena throws a cool bat-broom laser sword upgrade into the air. A Belunka flying through the air eats it, and then warps through time to a new location. (OshaliteX2) Now that the Future Duel is over, Agent Red tried to pull out a spear and cut the rope he’s trapped in. (Agent Red) Unfortunately, Helena notices him and stuffs him in a suitcase. Then she and Johnathan decide to go back home. (Sable-Xeno) Said home happens to be an old house from many years ago, which Helena inherited from her grandmother. She happened to be a bit of an eccentric, having the house moved many miles to Helena’s flying city before it was raised into the air. She told her that it used to be a casino, and said she took part in a huge gang war when she was young. She apparently called herself Treble Cannon back then, and the two shared many a moment over the ridiculous shenanigans she used to get into. Once she was done reminiscing, Helena walked into the the grand entrance hall, which she had turned into a living room. It featured several flying chairs and sofas, and a large Smart TV directly under a balcony perfect for shooting people from. Johnathan walks through the left doorway into his music room. Helena has a strange feeling that something completely ridiculous is about to happen. What will Helena do now?
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In the midst of the fighting, Alex Batterstump notices Agent Green and Agent Black about to enter the castle. He forgets he saw them. He noticed them again, but proceeds to forgot about them again. He notices them one last time, and finally remembers. He screams, “OH MY GOOOOOOOOOD!!” and then they charge into the fray. In a panic, Alex starts swinging his new laser-broom about in a frenzy. (OshaliteX2) He annihilates two Frenchmen, but then Agent Black, in his rush to enter to Time Machine Area, accidentally swerves into him, unable to predict his movements. (Agent Black) The two collide, and Black’s momentum throws them both into the Time Machine room. Alex gets up quickly, finding himself in the storage area. There are a bunch of barrels, boxes, and Frenchmen lying haphazardly about the room. To his right is a door leading into what seems to be the dungeon, and to the left is a pedestal containing a bright-white, gun-shaped object, with a emblem on the side that looks like the planet Saturn combined with a brown crate. The gun has a visor and keypad on top which seems to allow dates to be manually typed in. Meanwhile, Agent Green joins the battle outside, accidentally dropping their money on Frenchmen and Englishmen alike. (Agent Green) After knocking poor Sir Robin unconscious, Agent Green gets trapped in a Top 10 Anime Battle with Lord Dome and some random French guy. Horace and Will utilize the distraction to defeat more French scrubs, allowing King Arthur and several of his knights to escape into the Time Machine Room. King Arthur runs for the time machine on the pedestal, but Agent Black appears to be recovering quickly. What will Alex do now?
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Post by OshaliteX2 on Feb 27, 2017 22:50:16 GMT -5
Helena: Wait in pure anticipation.
Batterstump: Yoink the time machine quickly and use it to do the thing! You know... the... time thing.
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Post by Sable-Xeno on Feb 28, 2017 6:34:31 GMT -5
Something completely ridiculous: happen. Bonus points if it involves a references to a previous protagonist in the Generic series like cabbages or somethingAudience: canned laughter Agent Purple: Wake that slugabed Agent Silver up! *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Agent Green: Whip your tail back and forth, knocking back any who come close to you Agent Black: In a desperate bid to prevent anyone else from using the Time Machine...lick it with your birdy tongue, claiming it officially as your own. Lord Dome: Blast a high-volume Hydro Pump into Agent Green's face, reigniting his worst fear of drowning. Being a snake without arms makes swimming difficult, after all. Batterstump: Whack Agent Black with your broom. Pretty sure that's how you scare crows away...right? |
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Post by Planetbox on Feb 28, 2017 18:57:37 GMT -5
Agent Silver wakes up. canned laughter
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Alex, who gets to go first this time, notices Agent Black trying to taste the time machine. (Agent Black) He puts a stop to this nonsense by whacking him over the head with a broom. (Sable-Xeno) Meanwhile, the battle outside is escalating. Agent Green is all like I WHIP MY TAIL BACK AND FORTH I WHIP MY TAIL BACK AND FORTH knocking French guys every which way like a bunch of bowling pins. (Agent Green) Lord Dome puts a stop to his tomfoolery by blasting Agent Green in the face with a Hyper Hydro Pump, knocking him into the wall and then slowly pushing him up the wall and then into the air. (Sable-Xeno) Several French guys are caught in the blast, and knocked unconscious. Meanwhile, Horace successfully defeats a French general in an epic sword duel. It was pretty cool, I wish you could have seen it. Finally, Will shuts the door to the Time Machine Room to keep more French guys from getting in or out. Behind that door, the struggle continues between Alex and Agent Black. Alex is still severely beating the birdy guy with the broom, giving King Arthur the time he needs to retrieve the fabled time machine from the pedestal. (OshaliteX2) The king let out a jovial laugh and then he set the coordinates to the time period the Holy Grail was supposed to be in, and pressed the button clearly marked, “AWAY WE GO!” Then, everyone in the room was enveloped in a flash of orange light, quickly disappearing.
Helena waited around in her room for this mysterious event to finally happen. (OshaliteX2) Eventually, it finally did. A bright orange light appeared in the sky above her, which quickly vanished. A large group of people, including some bizarre crow creature, fell out of the air from the place the light was on. They all seemed to be dressed up as medieval knights. The one who seemed to be at the lead tossed a small gun looking device to the floor, and shouted, “At last, we have reached the future! Now to recover the Holy Grail, and return victorious!” Everyone in the group cheered, and the remaining minstrels began playing a jolly tune. Obviously, Helena is very confused regarding what’s actually going on here. What will Helena and Alex do now?
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Post by OshaliteX2 on Feb 28, 2017 21:56:09 GMT -5
Helena: Say "Helen--UH..."
Alex: Be BatterSTUMPED.
Helena: Ask what in heckeroni is going on.
Alex: GET DA HOILY GRALE
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Post by Sable-Xeno on Mar 1, 2017 3:09:23 GMT -5
"...Five more minutes...""...Can't let you do that, Agent Silver. There's much work to be done.""Hmm...wait...did I pass out?""You did. And whatever happened here, you lost because of it. Agent Blue filled me in...both Red and Yellow were kidnapped, too.""They got Alan...that's bad.""It is. That's why I'm here..."Agents Purple and Silver: make your way over to Helena's mansion, post-haste. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* As Agent Green is tossed about by the Hydro Pump, he sends an S.O.S. signal out to Agent Blue, fearing for his life. He's whisked away from the fight...along with, for plot convenience, Horace and Lord Dome. Where the three go? Nobody knows! You can thank Agent Blue for that. *+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Helena: ...The instant the Holy Grail is mentioned, you know they want your precious. But they cannot have precious. Yank a painting of a girl in a blue dress with Lucario legs off the wall, using it as a shield. Pretty sure that's fate-defying, right? Alex: Wander Get shoved into a nearby broom closet. Find another broom, bursting out dual-wielding brooms. Agent Black: "...Sh**. Guess I couldn't stop them from using the time machine. Oh, well...I guess now I'll have to call in for backup. Blue, proceed to send... it." "...You mean that Cyborg we reverse-engineered from the scraps of what you called that 'N.K. Cyborg?' Yeah, uh...it got blown to shreds."...N-no! Not Jeremy! He donated his brain to science! And JUSTICE!" "....Riiiiight. Anyways...you want me to send the other one?""Yes, please. And get Agent Green here, post-haste. We musn't leave tracks in the past!" "You know, if you're such an expert here, why'd you give the gig to me?""...I have my reasons, Gunpeng." "Sure ya do. Anyways, Agent Green's incoming. Got a few straddlers, too, so keep on guard. Also...you may or may not want to worry about Agents Red and Yellow. Some...stuff happened.""Of COURSE stuff happened." "...And don't think for a second I didn't see you trying to lick that Time Machine, Agent Black. Gross."Agent Black: Jump after the tossed-aside Time Machine. Retrieval of it is top-priority numero uno!...Also lick it. Liiiiiiick iiiiiiit.  Agent Blue: Roll your eyes, also providing a necessary face reveal from the action. Then deploy...  Little Pink. Little Pink: ROCKET FIST EVERYTHING Agent Red: Maybe try drilling some air holes in that suitcase? @ mention or reference every nerd that's participated in this CYOA for the upcoming finale. Which, from my studies, would be:  ...As well as Emperor Toad and Dimitri a few times on #Kun. Subsequently link all of them to a Kickstarter for your next CYOA. Sable: Slap Xeno for shilling faster than Notshalite with his Notshalite devices and home appliances. Give him another slap for over-working Planet with all these actions.
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Post by Planetbox on Mar 1, 2017 16:56:24 GMT -5
Agent Green and Lord Dome mysteriously dissapear! Horace doesn't though, because that would mess with his canon, which apparently takes place in this world. He rejoins Will, and the two of them, seeing that their job is complete, continue home to Araluen.
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King Arthur leads to knights in a charge towards Helena, who is still holding the grail. (OshaliteX2) In the commotion, Alex gets pushed into a broom closet, and one of the knights accidentally kicks the time machine against the opposite wall. It seems to be sparking a little. Probably a bad sign. Meanwhile, Helena is determined to NOT let them have the Holy Grail, since it seemed to be a pretty powerful weapon that could be useful in later Future Duels. So, she runs away. (Sable-Xeno) Meanwhile, she asks the knights why exactly they materialized in her home and started trying to steal her cup thing, but is unable to get a coherent response. (OshaliteX2) Meanwhile, Agent Black starts flying straight for the discarded time machine. (Agent Black) Unfotunately for him, Alex emerges from the broom closet he took a short vacation to with another broom, and whacks him out of the air! (Sable-Xeno) He then whacks Helena in the face, but she keeps a firm grip on the Holy Grail. Unfortunately, she fails to keep a firm grip on the ground, and she is sent flying against the far wall, right next to the time machine. Just when you thought things couldn't get any more ridiculous, Agent Blue deploys a super-cool robot named Little Pink. Though it may not be little, it sure as heck is pink! Little Pink decides to shoot rocket fists literally everywhere. (Agent Pink) King Arthur and his knights get totally owned and have to sit out for a bit after that. However, Agent Black and Alex are still a-okay. The two of them quickly dash towards Helena, who picks up the time machine, thinking it's some kind of laser pistol. She dashes off to the left, and Agent Black is quickly out-racing Alex. The latter stops him by throwing his second broom straight at the bird guy. Agent Black lets out a caw of mild annoyance, and then collapses. Alex keeps running, and for a moment it looks like Helena is trapped. However, a large rocket fist fired by Little Pink hits the wall between them and immediately explodes.
The explosion blasts out enough force to throw Alex away from the corner of the room. His broom slides across the floor as he struggles to get up. Once he does, he sees the dust settle around Helena, who is sprawled against the wall in quite a bit of pain. Alex looks for the time machine, and quickly finds it on the floor next to Helene. He also looks for the Holy Grail, and eventually notices that it was thrown halfway across the floor of the mansion. Looking back at the time machine, he notices that the device appears to be malfunctioning. It's vibrating in a rather frightening manner, large bolts of orange light shooting out at random. The handle and visor are no longer positioned correctly, as the whole thing seems to have been crushed by the force of the explosion. Helena, despite her weakness, picks up the device, and examines it closely. She notices that the visor is displaying a grim warning, "CRITICAL MALFUNCTION! GET AWAY!" The time machine starts vibrating and sparking even faster, and then it heats up to a temperature to high for Helena to hold it. She accidentally drops it, and the moment it hits the ground, it explodes. Bright orange lights surge out from the corner of the mansion. Alex is forced to cover the area with his hand to avoid being blinded. The light continues shining brightly for several seconds. And then, just as quickly as it came, the orange light fades away, revealing the corner of the room. There is no trace remaining of Helena Dimentio, who was perhaps obliterated by timey-whimey stuff. Before most of the people present can even take in the event, someone near the back of the room shouts, "WH- WHAT?! Who are you people?! Why are you here?! What did you do to Helena?!" Everyone turns to see Johnathan McChambers standing near the back of the room, holding a weaponized-guitar threateningly. He continues, "GET THE HECK OUT OF MY HOUSE!" and then swings the guitar into one of the minstrels, knocking him unconscious. Immediately, chaos resumes, as the knights and agents look for the grail, and Little Pink continues shooting fists. To make matters worse, Agent Red appears to be breaking out of Helena's suitcase (Agent Red), and Agent Silver and Agent Purple will likely arrive at the scene too. Not only that, but Alex and the knights' quickest means of escape is now destroyed. What will Alex do now?
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Post by OshaliteX2 on Mar 1, 2017 20:00:49 GMT -5
Helena: Become a time lord.
Alex: Somehow remind Jon about Tea Team in a twist that one of the Tea Team guys was ACTUALLY his great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great etc. grandfather!
If that doesn't stop him from killing you, then just try very hard to NOT get killed.
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Post by Sable-Xeno on Mar 2, 2017 1:52:40 GMT -5
Helena: Discover that you were warped to The End of Time. Can't do much there, though... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Agents Silver and Purple: Burst through the front doors of the Mansion! Agent Black: Mourn the broken Time Machine. "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUdge. That was the entire point of our mission! Now that it's broken-" "Then maybe you'll try doing something else? Perhaps about the kidnapped-Agents Red and Yellow: bust out of the suitcase. "Oof! So...cramped...""Air! Sweet air!""Agent Red! Agent Yellow! You're okay!""Yeah...uh...barely...oof..."And there goes my entire reason for being here. Now what?"Agent Green and Lord Dome: Drop on in. "...Oh! Hey, Sable!""Heya.""..." "So....is the mission compromised?""I'm leaning on 'yes'.""Then...should I withdraw everyone from this timezone now?""No way! There could still be a temporal anomaly lingering from that broken Time Machine! The Time Patrol's job isn't done here until we get to the bottom of it!...also...I kinda wanna work out some pent-up aggression from being beaten earlier."        Time Patrol: Pose as a team because SH*T JUST GOT REAL. Kinda.Agent Silver: Kindly refuse Jonathan's request, claiming both that there could still be something dangerously timey-wimey in the area...and remind him that his girlfriend/wife kidnapped his friends. That's a little higher on the jerk-off scale than sudden home invasion. Agent Red: Poke some of the knights with your scepter Agent Yellow: Glare at Jonathan menacingly. Agent Green: Coil angrily around Lord Dome. You know, for earlier. Agent Blue: Continue typing in numbers, scanning for any 'temporal anomalies' Agent Black: Find the Holy Grail. Then liiiiiiiick iiiiiiiiit. Agent Purple: ...Do nothing. You did say you had no interest in the scenario! Little Pink: ROCKET FISTS. EVERYWHERE.Alex: Note down that you gotta get back...back to the past... Samurai Jack. King Arthur: Inexplicably find the Canned Laughter from earlier, un-can it, and pour the contents into the Holy Grail. Then...drink it! |
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Post by Planetbox on Mar 2, 2017 19:26:30 GMT -5
Guys stop suggesting actions for Helena she died that’s why she’s in The Graveyard her entire physical body was completely obliterated you can’t give her actions anymore I know you’re upset but you just need to move on only by moving on can you learn to reach acceptance.
Alex tries to make Johnathan not upset at him by telling him about the Tea Team, which Alex should have no way of knowing about. (OshaliteX2) Unfortunately, the truth is that Johnathan’s true great-grandfather was actually Carl. I guess. The canonicity of that statement is uncertain. Also, he considers you responsible for his wife’s death, so a report from ancestry.com isn't gonna make him not want you to evacuate his private property. He explains this to Alex in no uncertain terms by whacking him in the face and sending him flying into the impressive double doors that serve as the entrance to the mansion. The Time Team, who apparently still aren’t gonna leave, have a discussion about their life goals and how cool they are. Agent Silver tells Johnathan that there could still be temporal issues hanging out in the mansion. He also calls John a stupidface because his wife locked him in a suitcase. (Agent Silver) However, John wasn’t entirely away for this, and also his wife just died so he isn’t exactly in the best mood. He associates his wife’s mysterious death with the individuals that appeared in his house five seconds before her demise, and shouts, “Are you saying some kind of kidnapping incident is worse than cold-blooded murder?! You’re all despicable!” He then plays an elegy that gives everybody the Crying status. Agent Yellow glares at Johnathan through his tears, but the man is too busy looking at sheet music to notice. (Agent Yellow) Meanwhile, Agent Green coils around Lord Dome. (Agent Green) Unfortunately, this plan failed when Lord Dome spontaneously combusts, sending Agent Green flying. Agent Red pokes some of the knights, but then Sir Bedevere gets mildly annoyed and kicks him in the face. (Agent Red) The ladybug scrub is crying too much to fight back. Agent Black tried to get the Holy Grail, but then he gets knocked out of the air by a rogue rocket fist by Little Pink. (Agent Black, Little Pink) Agent Purple is too busy crying to do anything whatsoever. (Agent Purple) In the confusion, King Arthur manages to grab the Holy Grail from where it lies, and also picks up some Canned Laughter lying around. (Sable-Xeno) It doesn’t take a genius to figure out the best way to combine these items, and before long King Arthur has chugs some pure laughter extract enchanted by the touch of the Holy Grail. This gives him magical powers that he activates using his jovial laugh. He notices Agent Blue furiously typing on a keyboard thingy, scanning for time anomalies. (Agent Blue) Fortunately, it seems as if there is only one anomaly present in the area. King Arthur laughs uproariously, opening this anomaly to form a wormhole through time. By looking through the wormhole, it is obvious that it leads to the French castle. Alex knows he must get back to the past, like a certain samurai of yore (Sable-Xeno), and he also knows that he should get out of this mansion before a grieving guitar guy throws him out the window. Now that King Arthur has the Holy Grail, perhaps he should leap through the wormhole as soon as he’s finished here. What will Alex do now?
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Post by emperortoad on Mar 3, 2017 9:46:45 GMT -5
Alex: Press F to sleep
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Post by Dimitri on Mar 3, 2017 16:16:29 GMT -5
Alex: Press B to boogie
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Post by OshaliteX2 on Mar 3, 2017 18:43:53 GMT -5
Alex: Press E to escape.
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Post by Sable-Xeno on Mar 3, 2017 23:44:31 GMT -5
Alex: Press A to NOT DIE AS FAST
Agent Purple: Press P to use PSI Healing Ω, causing everyone to stop crying.
Agent Silver: Press S to say 'it's no use!', lunging at the temporal anomaly with spacio-temporal duck tape.
Agent Black: Press L to lick the Holy Grail, or at least ask yourself why you keep trying to lick things lately.
Agent Yellow: Press B to Bark.
Agent Red: Press I to poke more people.
Agent Green: Press G to ow gold coins at Jonathan in an attempt to make up for Helena exploding into tiny itty-bitty pieces.
Jonathan: Press J to jam!
Little Pink: Press R to ROCKET FIST EVERYTHING
King Arthur: Press Y to yodel, the Holy Grail and the Canned Laughter purifying your throat to the point where the yodel draws awe from all in the room.
Lord Dome: Press N to get a reasonable explanation as to why you suddenly combusted.
Helena: ...Press X to interact with the others in the graveyard.
Assorted Minstrels: Press K to start singing the (Donkey) Kong Rap.
Agent Blue: Press several keys on your keyboard in quick succession to teleport the rest of the Time Patrol out of this situation. The Time Machine's gone, the Temporal Anomaly cannot be dealt with by your team's hands. This, however, has the unfortunate side-effect of Agent Blue performing every key-bound related action every time he presses the corresponding key. Meaning he'll fall asleep or something long before he gets to getting everyone out of there.
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Post by Planetbox on Mar 7, 2017 20:43:01 GMT -5
Qwerty, the Magical Keyboard Man, accidentally drops a typewriter into the room. It explodes, scattering several keys throughout the room. Everyone, out of curiosity, presses the nearest one. Agent Purple presses the P Key to activate PSI HEALING OMEGAAAAAAAA, which helps everyone find the comfort they need to stop sobbing uncontrollably. (Agent Purple) In response, Agent Amarillo presses the B Key and barks loudly out of happiness. No one cares. (Agent Yellow) Agent 红色 decides to use his newfound freedom to press the I Key poke more people than he’s ever poked before. Surprisingly, even less people care. (Agent Red) In this midst of this madness, Alex finds the A Key. He taps A quickly to not DIE AS FAST, making his impervious to death for one update. (Sable-Xeno) He seizes this chance to get some much needed shut-eye, pressing the nearby F Key. (emperortoad) More shenanigans ensue while he’s asleep. Helena presses the X Key to talk to dead people, except she’s not in the room so she just sorta does it, I guess. Pressing the S Key, Agent Silver shouts “iT’S SNOW YUSE!!!1” and throws some tape at the temporal anomaly. Unfortunately, the tape just sails through the time portal, accomplishing nothing. (Agent Silver) Meanwhile, Agent Black presses the L Key and tries to lick the Holy Grail, only for King Arthur to strike him down his sword. (Agent Black) He is thrown against the far wall and flies through two buildings and dies maybe probably not. Little Pink presses the R Key and continues shooting rocket fists at other people, but missed a lot because he’s dumb. (Little Pink) Finally, King Arthur throws down a Y Key and steps on it. (King Arthur) This activates his inner powers, allowing him to begin yodeling an inspiring tune. Everyone is so excited by the song, that they start dancing. Even Alex wakes up, and hits the dance floor, crushing the B Key as he begins to get his boogie down. Just when everyone thought the party couldn't get any more awesome, Johnathan McChambers throws down the J Key and begins playing the opening to “Free Bird” by Lynard Skynard on his acoustic guitar. (Johnathan McChambers) Recognizing the song, King Arthur begins yodeling the vocal parts. Suddenly, Johnathan throws his hat down before beginning the epic guitar solo. Agent Green throws a coin at the nearby G Key, and then throws even more coins into Johnathan McChambers’ hat. Some guy who wandered in yells, “Oh baby a triple!” He is kicked out by the Party Police. Once “Free Bird” is over, four of the minstrels jump onto the stage. They throw down the K Key and all press it at once, only to accidentally drop-kick each other in the face. Getting back up, they briefly apologize, and then press Alt+K instead. (Minstrels) Then they all tear off their minstrels outfits, revealing themselves to actually be Run-DMC and rap legend A-Nasty. The four pull out their microphones and perform the Donkey Kong Rap, with Johnathan McChambers joining on the electric guitar. With him distracted from his grief by the performance, Agent Blue decides to press a bunch of keys and get the heckeroni out of Dodge. (Agent Blue) Fortunately, he manages to avoid all the bothersome side effects fast enough to get everyone out of there, and before long all of the Time Team guys, including Agent Black and his dubious mortal state, are gone. Finally finally, Alex presses the E Key, jumping through the time portal along with King Arthur and the other Knights of the Round Table. (OshaliteX2) Once they’re through, the time portal closes on the party behind them. They find themselves standing in the time machine storage room, now abandoned. Once they go back outside, the French castle, they can finally return to England and proclaim their victory. Excitement is present on the faces of even the most stoic knight, for they have only one step left until they reach victory. What will Alex do now?
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Post by emperortoad on Mar 7, 2017 20:49:47 GMT -5
Everyone: Randomly burst into song for the next update, and frustrate planetobx by making him have to write the lyrics
and Everyone again: Don't forget the flying eggplant
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Feed me lemons or feed me life!
